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Holy Incinerator

The holy incinerator is a giant incinerator that is very, very holy. It is rumored that the holy incinerator isn't actually very, very holy at all, and in fact isn't even holy in the first place. However, those claims are quickly dismissed by the fact that the Holy Incinerator just sounds pretty damn cool.

The primary use of the holy incinerator is to permanently and thoroughly destroy objects that have been tainted by the foulness of purest evil. The incinerator itself resembles a fifty-foot forge of shining and otherworldly metal, intricately decorated and set deep into the mountain it is embedded within. Getting to the device requires marching through Mount Catacomb in the heart of the Plane of Snakes. Given the snakeocity of the Plane of Snakes, the incinerator is not often used save by those badass enough to get mudda-fuggin' snakes apart from the plane.

Using the incinerator requires three steps: first, one must open the incinerator, then toss in the offending item, and then close the incinerator door and let it do its magic. The object inside is obliterated through repeated showering with each of the four Elements, the four sub-elements, a tiny dash of the Ur- and Ur-Ur elements, a couple of Biological Elements, and a random sampling of Quarternary Elements just to be sure. Inevitably, the items fed to the machine will be cleansed into a fine and harmless sprinkle of ash or glass, its evil dispersed.

Some believe that, ironically, the holy incinerator has lost its holiness through rampant consumption of evil. Some have denied this by stepping into the incinerator themselves, to show the incinerator will not obliterate good and honest people. Unfortunately, such an act is highly hubristic and almost certainly rebukes the state of holiness held by anyone stepping inside, leading to vast ammounts of gore, terror, and lulz.

Others beleive that the holy incinerator was never actually holy in the first place, but rather simply named this as an attempt for the then owners of a very very large and otherwise useless incinerator located in the Plane of Snakes to somehow capitalize on their otherwise worthless investment. This may have paid off, however, as thousands of hapless folks with accursed and unholy items flock to the site of the holy incinerator each year to toss their items in and hopefully be rid of the curse. This pays off for the owners as they charge a fairly exorbitant fee for use of their so-called 'Holy' incinerator.

As its holiness has not yet been measured, it's up in the air as to whether or not the holy incinerator actually is.

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