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The Grammarous Anorus

Page history last edited by PBworks 18 years, 4 months ago

Back to Famous Weapons of Battal

 

The Grammarous Anorus

 

Called by some the "Grammarour Annoy-us", this moderately blunt sword is enchanted with a unique and useless spell called "Izan rammag" and it serves one purpose:

 

To annoy people by constantly pointing out minor grammar mistakes and in spoken and written mediums. Strangely, although the sword has never been used (because there's a legend that anyone wielding it will immediately cut off their own head), it is one of the most legendary swords in all of Battal. There are songs about it (which we'll spare you for now), children lie awake at night dreaming of a day when they might catch a glimpse of it, and even kings shudder when a rumor reaches their ear that the Grammarous Anorus has been sighted within their country's borders.

 

The Grammarous Anorus appears throughout the middle part of the cycle, with frequent references in Book 5 and Book 6. Legend has it that it was forged in the Bad Old Days before the Item Laws were created, since its name is in flagrant violation of Law 2. Some claim, however, that "Grammarous Anorus" is in full compliance with the requirement to fully describe the sword, except that it's in a language nobody understands. Nobody fully buys this argument, but the Item Death Squad (according to a digression in Book 6) has left it alone so far, since nobody wants some jerk of a sword pointing out the typos and grammatical infelicities in the Item Laws itself.

 

There was a fan theory at one point that the real reason the Grammarous Anorus was never wielded in the books is that it would probably derail the narrative by proofreading the very book it was in. There is another fan theory that suggests that would have been a good idea, since Tycho Brahe was never known for his precise deployment of commas.

 

On the various Usenet forums, there was a running gag in which people would "deploy the Grammarous Anorus!" when criticizing other people's spelling and grammar. As with all running gags on Usenet, it wasn't very funny.

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