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Advent ElamenSTAR

Page history last edited by API administrator user 10 years, 11 months ago

Back to the ElamenSTAR Episode Guide

Movie #3 出現エラメン☆ Advent ElamenSTAR (CG direct-to-video release) 26th November, 2004

Advent ElamenSTAR

 

The long-awaited movie version of ElamenSTAR, Advent ElamenSTAR was the massively-hyped CGI film released two years ago. While it has yet to be translated for an English release, many fans have downloaded it illegally, and the fansub (provided in a joint effort by former enemies The KF Group and L x P Loller Coasters) makes a regular circuit at conventions.

 

Summary

The following summary is far more in-depth than usual to give a contact buzz to the movie itself to satisfy fans who don't have the internet connection necessary to fully download the fansub of Advent ElamenSTAR.

The opening of Advent ElamenSTAR, before even the credits, is a jump cut from the producers' title cards to Lander turning to Zula and saying, "You know what I'm gonna do now? Strut." To the tunes of a Japanese rendition of Staying Alive, Lander grooves on the streets of what seems to be Quilpopolis, under the shadow of Mount Wor; the credits roll over his three-inch-thick-boot-assisted stroll through the streets of the city. Just as abrupt as it begins, Lander pulls to a stop at a crossroads, turns to the camera, and explodes into a billion ceramic pieces.

 

After this confounding, some have said nightmarish, opening, the movie immediately cuts to a teenaged Lander and Wendel, riding horses with their backs against the sunrise. After three minutes of silent riding, Lander says, "Who the hell are you?" And then explodes into a billion ceramic pieces.

 

From here the movie switches to the POV of Zula and Philia, who are staring intently at each other for a good five minutes as Rubirocks's Passion for Love Eternally plays quietly in the background. When it ends, Zula utters, "Who the hell are you?" Then Lander pops out of the air, says "I'm--" and then explodes into a billion ceramic pieces.

 

To the relief of the audience, the next scene opens on Char Reyarteb waiting in his flying fortress, Slayer Of Battal, as it hovers over the still-abandoned remains of The Land of Thrown Fish. Audience hopes immediately perish as the camera flows through the imposing flying citadel and to Char himself, who is reading a parchment intently under the light of the Starborn Gem. Audience hopes rise again as MooMaa himself emerges, only to get kidney-punched again as Moo Maa begins a lengthly discussion about the difference between Middleclang steakwiches and NastyPlanes steakwiches ("They don't have beef in the Nasty Planes. Instead, they have Ihmho cows. So they call 'em 'Greefstacks.'"). Then Moo Maa casually notes that there are some teenagers out there rallying an army to fight against him. Char scoffs and utters, "It's not like they previously attempted to defeat me, only to fail, then erased their memories and went back to the beginning of their journey in order to instigate a farther-reaching plan to finally face me and my armies in combat and emerge victorious. Spectre please."

 

From here the movie gets the audience's attention back. The next scene is that of a poleboat stable in Steam Shallows. Wendel is nursing a large alcoholic beverage when a dusky, handsome young lad strides in, despite the protests of some of the poleboat pilots. He sits next to Wendel, who bluntly asks, "Who the hell are you?" Just as the audience expects Lander to explode into a billion ceramic pieces, Lander defies expectation and doesn't. "I think we knew each other," he confides. "Walk with me a while."

 

The two go for a walk along the banks of Steam Shallows, discussing what's happened over the last ten years--nothing but a discovery of a rubian, intense study of Elemenstation, and mindless piloting for Wendel and grave-digging/robbing for Lander. Lander states that he knew something was odd with his rubian, but couldn't place what--and then he got the urge to go to Steam Shallows and find Wendel here. Wendel dismisses it.

 

That's when the Fleshreapers appear. Fighting ensues to the delight of all.

 

Pressed into escaping from the horde of Fleshreapers chasing after them, Lander leads them where his Rubian seems to demand them to go. Wendel grudgingly admits that what they're doing feels right. They soon arrive in E'Lylin, and see that a concert is going down, starring the beloved tuba soloist and Ice Elemenstor Philia. They watch, enraptured, as she tubas the living hell out of a raucus folk tune. The two meet up with the tuba player, only to find that she's been waiting for them, and that she's ready to find the fourth member of their team--just in time to avoid the oncoming horde of Peeps and noobs as they ineffectually swarm E'Lylin.

 

Travelling to Lesser Saltmarsh, the three encounter the last member of their team--Zula, who has grown into a truly angelic young woman, although one unnecessarily beset by mutant land-based Claw Shrimp. After saving her and using her Wings of Destiny gear to hit the skies, the four hide amongst the clouds, evading the airborn horrors of Char Reyarteb's army and discuss what's happening to them. They've come to the realization that it's their destiny to somehow defeat the indestructable Reyarteb and his vast armies. They're not quite sure how they're going to do it... but they've got to try.

 

Raising an army turns out to be easier than it sounds; the four combine their elemenstational might to clear Choxo Town of its swarm of monsters and announcing that anyone interested in joining their campaign to defeat Char Reyarteb aught to, rapidly. Interested parties rapidly accumulate. An army-building montage is had to a rock ballad version of A High Elemenstor's Elemenstave Has An Eldritch And Even Sometimes Epic Knob On The End.

 

Meanwhile, Char tiredly observes the Wizbits readying their hastily-erected military against him. Final Shade Moo Maa states he should be more watchful of the four, seeing as how they decimated all attempts to destroy them. Char complains that Moo Maa is getting just as annoying as Lady Absinthia, and almost as bad as her legions of fanboys. Rather than press the issue, Moo changes the subject to that of Reyarteb's breakfast ("Greefstacks! The cornerstone of every nutritious breakfast!").

 

Meanwhile, Zula and Lander are having a private moment while Wendel teaches their soldiers how to wage psychological war on their foes ("Squint! Squint harder!!!"). This is used as a flimsy excuse to bring in a stirring jazz-blues cover of Within You, Without You.

 

Meanwhile-er, a team of horrors emerges from the depths of the earth outside of Choxo Town, intent on re-conquering the town, only to be driven back by the small-in-number but well-trained soldiers of the Four Underdogs (as the army spontaneously dubs them, as if acting on a memory long-supressed).

 

After yet another defeat, Char Reyarteb's monacle flies off, and he declares to his armies that they're going to say "screw it" and nip the threat in the bud, and summons all his armies together to the Slayer of Battal. As The Shield is temporarily released from being choked by the armies of the great and evil Elemenstor, more and more warriors flood in, including numerous cameo appearances by various fan-favorite characters of the era.

 

The Slayer of Battal aproaches Choxo Town. The Four Underdogs give their armies a final go-through, including a stirring speech by Lander:

 

"Let's not kid ourselves, we're boned like a graveyard. If any of us survive this, more than likely it will be because they have been selected for unique and unspeakable horrors the likes of which no living man has ever had to endure before. Really, I just expect you to go out there and give it your best shot before being made to choke down a Lizardman's jagged metal implement. Actually, I've researched a series of accounts ab--"

 

It is at this point that Wendel clobbers him to keep from further disenfranchising the hopeful masses.

 

More personal interludes with the Four Underdogs break up the time between the speech and Char's Slayer of Battal. Before the final battle erupts, there is an epic shot of the army of the Four Underdogs gearing up for combat and the Slayer of Battal's teeming hordes of monsters preparing to smite the assembled opposition. The shot is full of tiny details and impressive moments--enough so that the shot is looped for around twenty minutes before the first blow is struck.

 

What happens next has been described by awe-struck fans as "pretty neat": the armies finally meeting and kicking each others' asses. Explosions rock the screen, creatures die in droves, and Moo Maa's penultimate form of his numerous penultimate forms spills forth and rocks the Wizbits' faces.

 

After the fifteen-minute set-piece battle finally draws near its conclusion, all that's left of the enemy forces is Char Reyarteb himself, understandably startled. The combat against him alone takes up a full twelve minutes, breaking across numerous environs throughout Battal. When this last battle draws to a close, they've full-circled back to the orginal battlefield, all four of the Underdogs blasting him into his fortress, which shatters and collapses to the earth outside Choxo Town. Emerging from the wreckage, he stares his destiny straight on: Lander launches a meteor, which consumes Char Reyarteb's form. Standing motionless for half a minute, Reyarteb utters, "Aw, shit," collapses, and explodes in a fountain of blood and fire.

 

Smiling, weary, Lander turns and kisses his beloved...

 

...Philia? He confesses his love to her--how he's beginning to remember how much he loved her. Zula, who was fully aware this was the boy she'd missed so long ago, procedes to bash his skull in with her own rubian in a rather graphic fashion. In the midst of one burst of grue and brain, the Ocumen pauses the action and observes, "I do believe something went horribly wrong. Alright, let's try that again." A quick compilation shows the Wizbits living their entire journey again. At the climactic moment, Lander, smiling, weary, turns and kisses his beloved...

 

...Wendel.

 

The Ocumen pauses the action in the midst of another braining, and observes, "Perhaps if I did something just a little different..." The Four Underdogs re-relive their destiny. The moment concludes with Mayumi decapitating Reyarteb with a box cutter, an impressive feat, before giving Lander something best described as between a kiss and a beating. The Ocumen thinks, "Perhaps if I don't interfere at all," then simply restarts the history of Battal. What ensues then is a prolonged chase of the Ocumen by a horde of legged tentacles.

 

After escaping his tentacled fate, the Ocumen decides that maybe he almost had it right that second-to-last time, and re-restarts the history of Battal. The Four Underdogs finish off Char Reyarteb with a hail of gunfire. The Ocumen changes things one more time, inspired by his last mistake. Just before Lander kisses Philia, the Ocumen appears, in his full glory, and pistol-whips Lander upside his head. Knocked to his senses, he finally meets his appointed girlfriend's lips.

 

The final scene is of the Wizbits presiding over the Cerulean Citadel, observing all they've accomplished. Lander smiles, turns to Philia, and says, "Who the hell are you?", then explodes into a billion ceramic shards.

 

Roll credits.

 

Notes

It is said by many that Advent ElamenSTAR was the movie that should have been the final two episodes of the series, and finally gave the closure that fans of the anime had long clamored for, as well as affording the rare oppertunity to see Lander repeatedly explode, get his brains bashed in, and achieve the great honor of being the only canon character to get pistol-whipped by the Ocumen.

 

The significance of Lander's repeated explosions has been confirmed by the director to symblize Aklom Reklats's curiously unseen attendance in the battle.

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