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Page history last edited by PBworks 13 years, 3 months ago

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An Apprentice Air Elemenstor with long golden hair, beautiful features and a quick temper, and one of the Five Chose Ones of Alfafanar. Her familiar is a Monkeyparrot, but its name is never given and, oddly enough, it doesn't talk much. Being from Alfafanar, naturally, Alanamara was destined for great things. She is the main character of the third story in Gordy Baron's compilation and arguably one of the most popular as the only female protagonist in the collection.


Alanamara's story takes place in the years running up to the Great Elemenstation War, when the Twelve Scourges of Battal were terrorizing the world. She begins as an apprentice of the Cerulean Citadel and one of Wendel's lovers, though the story opens with Wendel spurning her for another student. This breakup leads her to take a sabbatical from her education and spend some time on the front lines, defending innocent villagers against the pillaging hordes commanded by the Twelve.


She falls in love with a peasant boy, who dies horribly as a direct result of Alanamara's ineptitude. She resolves to do better and learns many heartwarming lessons about believing in herself. In the end, some two years after leaving the Citadel, she makes a brave personal sacrifice, helping turn the tide of the Great Elemenstation War in favor of the Cerulean Citadel, but the sacrifice leaves her so disfigured that she is unable to ever again wear a hat.


Like all of Gordy Baron's works, this short story is most tactfully described as "vomit-inducingly horrible." Alanamara's tale is, however, somewhat special; when held up against The Scourges Pentadecaphron, it is not the worst, or even the second-worst, but only the sixteenth-worst-written story about the years leading up to the Great Elemenstation War. Indeed, Don't Be a Scourge of Battal while Striking Your Gear in the Shield (The Scourges Pentadecaphron Book 14) includes several chapters made up of wholesale plagiarism of Alanamara's tale, with a little bit of sex and violence thrown in to spice things up.


It is unknown why this particular era holds so much appeal for some of the worst authors in human history. Many fans speculate that because the ElamenSTAR anime poured so much Epicness into the time period immediately preceeding this period, and because Tycho Brahe himself poured so much Epicness into The Elemenstor Cycle which immediately follows this period, cramming truly brilliant Epicness into the Great Elemenstation War itself would cause the Epicness of Battal to reach critical mass, imploding the entire property.


This is, of course, utter drek.

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