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Cult of Absinth

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Back to Religions of Battal

 

Cult of Absinth

 

That is not dead which can eternal be ill

And with strange aeons even death takes a chill.--The Dread Couplet of the Cult of Absinth

 

Five thousand years before Lady Absinthia was born, the Cult of Absinth brewed in the mind of Armano, a lay man who acquired the gift/curse of immortality purely by magical accident. One cruel evening in the year 9,997, Armano collapsed in his fields, overwhelmed by visions of a great sundering, and of a mighty magician leading the world to ruin with a beautiful young woman at his side; it was the woman who entranced him more than the sorcerer, and before the vision ended, he caught a snatch of her name: "Absinth--"

 

There, on the spot, he declared himself the first high priest of the Cult of Absinth. It was rough going for quite some time, though, as he was worshipping a woman that wouldn't be born for some five-thousand-some-odd-years, and all of his old friends laughed at him, thinking he was a fool. If he was a fool, he was also an immortal fool, and aged not a day since that moment.

 

When Lady Absinthia was born, Armano sensed her, and from the shadows followed her birth and development. When followers began to flock to her Armano joined them, finally finding peers who shared his enthrallment. He continued to watch her from far away, never quite getting of the courage to approach her and speak with her. And so he watched, all the way through The Sundering and until she died her melodramatic death at the hands of Char Reyarteb. After her death, many of her followers joined Armano's til-then-silent cult, greatly increasing the size of the order.

 

Eventually, the Cult of Absinth went on to be one of the most dangerous organizations in all the world, as it was primarily composed of hopeless fanboys with world-shattering powers pining after an ideal woman who was not only unapproachable but temporarily dead.

 

Goals

  • Pre-Lady-Absinthia: Wait for Lady Absinthia; assure followers that this will be a totally awesome event.
  • During-Lady-Absinthia: Follow Lady Absinthia.
  • Post-Lady-Absinthia: Ressurect Lady Absinthia. The ritual to ressurect her relies heavily on the Clockpace Comet, which leads to post-Absinthia goal 2,
  • Follow the Clockpace Comet across its odd dimensional path until it "gets it right."
  • Take deep umbrage at anyone who dares insult Lady Absinthia, and then explode them.
  • Make delicious delicious tea.
  • Beat guys up and take their stuff. Uh, in preparation for the day when Lady Absinthia returns.

 

In the Elemenstor Saga

  • The Cult of Absinth features strongly into Elemenstor Gearstrike, when it finally succeeds in its stated goal.
  • An early Cult of Absinth features in the Tales of the Forever Road.
  • A man that looks like Armano can be seen in the background of an episode of The Wizbits Cartoon, reading up on elemenstation.
  • The Cult makes a strong showing in the 3rd season of ElamenSTAR, where numerous episodes center around beating up the Cult Monster/Sorcerer/Elemenstor/Whatever of the Week.
  • A rumored remake of Wizbit Trap may involve the Cult of Absinth abducting/"abducting" sacrifices/"sacrifices" to Absinthia/"Octo-Absinthia", depending on weather one plays the planned English or Japanese version.

Comments (4)

Anonymous said

at 9:35 pm on Jan 11, 2006

you know... before reading this article, I hadn't even remembered that cult was founded well before lady absinthia was born.

Anonymous said

at 10:18 pm on Jan 11, 2006

What I can't figure out is why they're trying to ressurect her in [Tales of the Forever Road] approximately 8,000 years before she dies... then again, maybe [Armano] had actually travelled back in time just to get the map... I could never tell exactly how much tele- and chronosorc'lery that was going on. I guess that's why it's not canon.

Anonymous said

at 10:22 pm on Jan 11, 2006

I think that it is canon. Interestingly, the story itself doesn't specifically mention them trying to ressurect lady absinthia. If not chronosorc'lery, possibly they were going to summon her... perhaps from the future?

Anonymous said

at 11:29 pm on Jan 11, 2006

My guess would be that the stated Goals are those from AFTER she dies... I mean, the dude is immortal, has a crush on her, watches her die... wouldn't YOU try to resurrect her? I bet the Goals of the Cult before the Lady was born were something like "Wait around until this woman is born and then try to find her" but that doesn't sound terribly [Epicness|Epic] now does it. ;)

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