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Great Unhappening

Page history last edited by API administrator user 13 years, 1 month ago

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The Great Unhappening


"Anyway, I call it the Great Unhappening, and it really happened! If it didn't, then find my shoes! I LIKED those shoes!" --A Horribly Underqualified Elemenstor


22,031 - At some point during this year, after the conclusion of the Second Great Elemenstation War, the Great Unhappenening occured, though unfortunately no-one, not even the beings contained within the Starborn Gem, realised it.


The incident itself was caused by a passing diety, who tripped on the very fabric of time of Battal itself, rending it asunder and subsequently ending time in Battal and effectively destroying everything everyone worked so hard to create. Needless to say, had anyone realised what had happened, they would have been "a bit peeved".


Fortunately, the passing deity (whose name is physically unpronounceable and has no legitimate spelling in the english language) was a fairly dab hand with a needle and cosmic thread, so he/she/it repaired the fabric and thus returned Battal to its former glory (Called the Great Rehappening) . In fact, only one person was aware that anything had happened (at the time), and though he did not realise that he had not existed for nearly half an hour, he did notice that his head, once perfectly positioned on his shoulders (he was quite proud of his head, in fact) was now facing backwards. He subsequently died and his corpse was burnt on a traditional funeral pyre, as more than one person lost their lunch when the body was displayed in an open casket. This the only obvious evidence of the Great Unhappening was destroyed, and many scholars are convinced that the Great Unhappening never occured, and those who back the theory are called "warschnippers" behind their backs.


The term "warschnippers" is of dubious origin.


It was discovered that the Great Unhappening occured when a particularly difficult divining elemenstoration performed by a horribly underqualified elemenstor went wrong, having been intended to discover the location of the aforementioned elemestors new shoes; it instead discovered that the Great Unhappening (and obviously the subsequent Great Rehappening) had happened, thus the elemenstor claimed that the spell had gone fine (despite the small fires), having discovered that his shoes were destroyed by the Great Unhappening.


Detractors claim that the elemenstor in question invented the Great Unhappening in order to cover up the fact that he had left his shoes in another elementsor's ambulatory dresser, which had subsequently left. Others claim that the shoes never existed, however when asked about their opinion on the Great Unhappening, they usually change the subject.

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