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Peeps

Page history last edited by API administrator user 12 years, 10 months ago

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Peeps

"I mean, just look at ourselves. We've done nothing for two straight years but walk around the forest and battle peeps. Excuse me, wargeese." - Steppy

 

Bogyn's Nastiness Rating: -27 (Harmless)

 

There is no monster throughout all of Battal quite as ubiquitous as the Peep. Resembling a 3' tall, pastel pink duckling/penguin, peeps lumber towards their victims and peck at them with the tooth they use to break out of their hard shells. Peeps do not impress on their parents, and immediately begin a life of ambling after people and pecking at them until they die. Or so goes the theory; in all the history of Battal from The Forlorn Era Of Pensive Twiddle's giant Ur-Peeps to The Ending Times's Degenerate Cave Peeps, there has not been a single thing killed by a peep.

 

Peeps have been trumped up by evil armies and certain dedicated peep-slaughterers as being deadly Wargeese. Few have fallen for it. Those that did later put stick to peep and found out otherwise.

 

Despite their lack of anything special, peeps have a deep symbolic significance throughout the stories told in Battal. They stand for futility and the bravery of those who stare futility in the face and get up another day. The legendary peep king King Peep, who lasted a full week outside his shell, laid trillions upon trillions of eggs before dying, ensuring that peeps would plague (well, "plague") Battal for quite some time to come.

 

It is Steppy's incessent slaying of peeps, and her growing tired of it, that helps push her to get Gavment out of retirement and to his newest adventure in Book 4.

 

A unique quirk of the peep's reproduction cycle is that, upon hatching, it immediately lays thousands of eggs for not its own specie, but that of its degenerate breathren, the lowly noob.

 

Peeps are well known for their Peep Down which makes an excellent padding, often in sports equipment.

 

In the Epic Fantasy Warrior Quest videogame series, it is revealed in the sixth game that feeding Peeps Hollow Chocolate Bunnies causes them to double in size, which makes them ideal modes of transportation for those allergic to Horses. They quickly became one of the main mascots of the series (alongside the Fluddle), and even gained a number of spinoff games geared towards children, such as Peep's Confusing Underworld.

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