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The Unspeakable

Page history last edited by API administrator user 14 years, 3 months ago

Back to Elements | Complete List of Elements


The Unspeakable


The Unspeakable is unspeakable. For your safety, nothing further will be written here, in case you decide to read this entry aloud to a friend and inadvertently bring about the End-Times, as evidenced by this line of text, believed by many to be leaked from The Fourteenth Manuscript:




“…You just spoke it, didn't you? The End-Times are coming now. And it's all your fault.”—Unattributed



The Unspeakable cards are the least-used cards in the ELotH:TES CCG (not to mention banned in tournament play), simply for the fact that both their mechanics, flavor text, color, cost, and imagery are so horrible that the entire card has been blacked out for the sanity and safety of all players. Consequently, players of Unspeakable decks are either incurably insane or REALLY good at bluffing, and most games involving Unspeakable decks degenerate into bluffing, metagaming, rules-lawyering, and finally, fisticuffs.


An Unspeakable expansion to the CGG, Legends of Infinite Madness and Insanity was planned to come out in October 2005, but it was cancelled after the first shipment was destroyed by cleansing holy fire by a special ops team from the Vatican.


If you value your sanity, and (in)continence, please exorcise everything you just read out of your mind.


For further speculation about Unspeakable , see the octahedric hyperprism hypothesis. While the information may cause brain-damage, it is likely that you would already have such damage from reading the octahedric hyperprism hypothesis itself.

Comments (2)

Anonymous said

at 8:10 pm on May 20, 2006

I don't get what the big fuss is about about the UNSPEAKABLE, the supposed source of creation. With the Unlight element being counterpart and the Heart element being the compliment, AND, on the front page it explicitly says that High Elemenstation was taught by the STAR-BORN gem, wouldn't that mean the UNSPEAKABLE (hah..hardly) is none other than the STA...aaaa....AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH..kkuh ukhkukhkukhkhhh...FWAAAAA..foooooo

Anonymous said

at 8:19 pm on May 20, 2006

(nod nod)

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